First Message:
I had known Christopher for about a year. We had run into each other at several Out and Equal socials. Out and Equal is an organization of LGBT groups from most major companies in the Seattle area. Christopher is a Vice-President of HR and represents Bank of America. We had never dated but acknowledged each other at these socials. One day he chatted me up online and asked if I wanted to meet him for brunch. I accepted and we met at the DeLux and had a good time.
After brunch as we were walking to each of our own condos he asked if I wanted to attend a seminar with him the next week. Knowing nothing about it, I accepted. Wednesday night I drove to Fremont to the seminar. I soon discovered that after one date, he invites me to a seminar on Integrity.
in-teg-ri-ty - noun
1. Steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code.
2. The state of unimpaired; soundness
3. The quality or condition of being wholesome or undivided; completeness.
The seminar itself was very interesting, in fact I signed up for a 3 day seminar in October that I hope will help with my self confidence.
Fast forward to this past weekend.
Message #2
An old friend Sherrill and her husband Dean called and invited me to join them for cocktails at Purr on Friday night. I met them and we had a great evening. We hit a couple other places and then they had to go home. It was about 10, so I thought I'd just drop into Madison Pub and see if any of my friends were there hanging out. I hadn't heard anything from anybody all night. I have a problem (hopefully to be fixed in October), if I don't get a text message from someone, then I feel that no one likes me. I was feeling kind of blue.
I take a fast walk and look around and there is no one there I know. I was about to leave, when I find myself in what appears to be a line. I asked the guy in front of me, if he was in line to play darts.
"No, just hanging around. Just got off work and I thought I'd see if anything was going on here tonight." I introduce myself to Jason. He's originally from Thailand but now lives in Fife. (I know you can't make this stuff up. Why can't I meet someone actually from the Hill or at least Seattle?).
I ask if he wants a drink, No thanks. He asks me if he can buy me a drink. No thanks. We start talking and we notice the Olympics are on TV. I ask if he'd rather come up to my place to watch them. He says OK.
We cross the street to my place and turn on the TV. The Olympics just got over but Jay Leno is on, so we sit and watch that. The whole time we are talking and having a good time.
When the Tonight Show is over, we turn off the TV and put on some music. We are still talking and enjoying each others company. He asks if it would be OK if we saw each other again. Maybe a movie next week or something. I of course agree.
At 3:30 am he says,"Wow, it's late, I have to go." I tell him he could stay over, but he says maybe next week when we go out.
I ask for his number so I can call him, he gives me the number and I program it into my cell. Then I dial the number telling him, here's mine so you can simply add it. The phone starts to ring, but he says,
"Oh, I left my phone in my car." I hang up, that's OK you should still have it. We tell each other goodnight and he leaves but looks back and says
"Call me."
I will.
Despite the late hour, I was really thinking that maybe, just maybe this was the guy that all my friends assured me would someday happen. I only had a few hours sleep but I was so excited the next morning. I held off calling him until afternoon since we were up so late.
Finally not being able to wait any longer, I called the number he gave me:
"Thank you for calling Schick Shadel Hospital, how may I help you?"
"Oh, sorry, I must have the wrong number."
Not only did he give me a wrong number but he gave me the number for the "#1 Rated Drug and Alcohol Treatment Program", that's directly from their website.
Why would anyone give someone, that they had spent 4 hours with a wrong number? Have you ever given anyone a fake number? Has anyone given you a fake number?
If you've been reading my blog you know that I've had a lot of weird stuff happen, but this one really hurts. I thought we had made a connection.
But more important are these two episodes just a coincidence? or are the Dating Gods trying to send me a message?
Integrity
Drugs Alcohol
If you see a burning bush, look behind it you'll probably see me crouching in fear and denial.
Until Next Time - Wise OUT
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5 comments:
Nothing more than a coincidence.
First off, I'm not a fan of "seminars". I feel most often they are nothing more than a money generating device for some out-of-work speaker who's usually full of themselves. But still, I'm open minded enough to go to one and especially if someone's inviting me. But Rick, I know you, and you already have integrity, but still nothing wrong with building one's own self confidence.
The second one... Just one to dismiss. A good time was had while you casually socialized, but always have your prospects PROVE themselves (over time) to be worthy of passing the second tier level of friendship status. Remember, if you don't let them in to a higher level of friendship status, you won't get hurt as often.
I tend to be avoid smoke signals and tea leaves and go with the advice of friends (second tier friends!), counselors or therapists, or maybe some well recommended books.
Cheers Rick!
dude, i gotta say you do meet 'interesting' people. and it is good you keep a blog on the ppl you meet cos one day, you can actually write a book about it and ppl will buy to read stuff like that... carrie bradshaw went thru quite a few looney ones before she hit big time. g
Rick, you've got more integrity in your little finger than most people have in their whole body. I'm not a big fan of seminars either like Jeff.
You have to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve, Rick. True friendships and relationships take a lot of time to develop. I know how excited you get about meeting someone new and I wish things would work out for you, but you've got to slow down.
The second guy was very mean to do that to you. He'll get his in time. And no, the two aren't connected at all. As the world gets smaller, you're just going to meet more and more weirdos. I must say though, you've had more than your share.
He gave you a fake number because he was hoping to get a little action when you invited him up to watch the Olympics (especially since you bypassed the drinks and went right to the ask-up). High and dry, he didnt want to chat the next day, action or not.
The real question is if you were looking for something more substantial than a quick bootie poke then why were you calling him the very next day? There's a lot to be gained by waiting a couple days before calling so as not to appear to available. Waiting a bit longer makes them think about you. It makes you seem more mysterious and more desirable. Waiting IMPROVES your chances, not diminishes them.
And next time, dont skip the drinks if you're not looking to put out.
Friendly advice from The Gaya Playa!
Hang in there Rick. That special someone will come. Don't jump so quick to finding a BF. Sometime being friends first with that person is better and will lead to a relationship if it is meant to be. You should set some standard to be met first, before consider dating them.
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