Crotch Less In Seattle

A lot of folks make New Years Resolutions. Eat better, Loose weight, stick to
a budget, Blah, Blah, Blah !!
Send me an email in about a month and let me know how these are going for you.

This year I made no resolutions, but I did promise myself that I was going to teach myself how to sew.
I always buy my jeans at the Gap. I like how they look and they always have my size. Wouldn't you think that 29 or 30 waist and a 30 inseam would be a pretty standard size?
No. I can find 30 waist and 36 inch inseam. What are these guys like 6 ft 8 and weigh 90 lbs? or 42 inch waist and 30 inch inseam. These guys are just opposite. They must look like balloons.

My only complaint with Gap jeans is that they wear out in the crotch. OK make jokes, let's go with the one that my endowment is causing them to rip! I have 4 pair of Gap jeans that are so worn "down there" that I am now crotch less. So on Thursday afternoon, I decided it was now time to learn how to sew. I went to Walgreens and bought a little sewing kit. I opened the kit and it took almost a half hour before I could even figure out how to get the thread off the little spindle thingy. I finally got some thread and then I tried to stick the thread thru the needle holey thing. I remember watching my grandmother licking the end of the thread and simply pushing it through. I swear the holes must have been bigger then. I never did get the thread in the hole. Later in my carpool, they asked me if I tried using the little aluminum thing that is made to thread the needle? I thought that was just advertising thing so I threw that away!

I got frustrated and went back to the store and bought a bunch of iron on patches. I ironed the patch on my first pair of jeans and it stuck!! However, I patched it on the outside so my light blue jeans now have a dark blue patch right on the crotch, from the front all the way back to the ass. Not sure what I'm advertising here.

I got smart after the first one and turned the jeans inside out and patched from the inside. It's amazing they worked. So I'm not crotchless anymore. What a relief. I never did learn how to sew, but I did repair my pants, which really was my goal. So be careful what you ask for, remember it's the end product you are seeking.

Sewing probably will never happen, but I am an ironing GOD.

Until Next Time - Wise OUT