It's Sunday night and I find myself sitting in the ICU room at Providence hospital in Everett. I'm holding the hand of my aunt who is on life support. This is the woman who didn't have any kids until I was about 8 years old. For those first years, she claimed I was her kid.
I leaned up and whispered to her and started reminiscing. I'm not sure she knew I was there or if she could hear me. This was entirely for me. I told stories and found myself laughing and crying.
Then it would get quiet and I would sit back down, still holding her hand. Then I'd remember another story and get up and whispered another memory.
She was so funny and alive. She came to my 18th birthday and by the time the party was over, all my friends fell in love with her.
My oldest cousin couldn't say Roberta, so she called her Dodo. And it stuck. I remember being about 10 years old at a family reunion. My older cousin, Kevin, called her Roberta. She stopped and pointed at him. "Listen if you're too big to call me Dodo, then you call me Aunt Roberta, but never just Roberta."
I remembered that vividly and I never wanted to disappoint her so I doubled it to Aunt Dodo.
After a couple hours I leaned over and kissed her and said "I love you Aunt Dodo, Goodbye." Then I walked out never looking back.
Some people have responded to my blog stating that it's OK to stay in and watch TV. Maybe that's right. But I believe we have to live life. If there's something you want to do - do it. If there's something you want to ask or say to someone, but afraid of the answer or not wanting to feel rejection. Go ahead and do it. Rejection is a feeling, proving you are still alive.
All too soon we will be lying in a bed with someone holding our hand and whispering memories. I may want to open my eyes and tell them I love them too or share one more story. Or maybe I just want to sleep and go peacefully. One thing I do know, I do want someone holding my hand.
We all live big huge lives. Think about it, we all have family and friends. We've had jobs we liked and jobs we hated. We've had success and failure. We laugh and cry. Then we end up in a bed connected to a machine clicking away every 2 minutes.
At 3:50 they removed life support and at 4:00 Aunt Dodo had died.
Until Next Time - Wise OUT
Monday, November 19, 2007
Saturday, November 17, 2007
The Bible Tells Me So
This is one of the harder blogs I've written. Usually I simply write about my experiences. I guess its a slow news night. Last time I wrote about hypocrites and Republicans. Today I talk about Religion. I don't feel qualified writing this, I'm not a biblical scholar or a historian. I'm just writing my observations.
I get upset at right-wing Christians that quote the Old Testament while conveniently ignoring the lessons learned from the New Testament. The current argument they are expousing is that marriage is a holy union between one man and one woman. Well if one reads the Old Testament, marriage is actually a union between one man and several, even hundreds of women. Like I said I'm not a biblical scholar, so I guess I missed the part where the Red Seas parted and someone came forward and actually changed the definition of marriage.
They quote Leviticus as proof that homosexuality is a sin. People should try reading the entire book of Leviticus and discover that homosexuality is the same degree of a sin as eating shrimp. Think about that the next time you visit the Red Lobster.
There is a minister from Kansas that protests at the funerals of soldiers that have died in Iraq and Afghanastan. He and his followers claim the soldiers deserved to die because of the liberal policies of the US toward gay rights. I can't imagine what it would be like being a parent or a brother of one of these soldiers. Shame on anyone who does or thinks this.
Whether you are Christian, Jewish, Moslem, Buddhist, Hindu, Pagen or an atheist, we should all live by the words and wisdom of Jesus, Budda, Ghandi, and Martin Luther King Jr.
Gay bashing has been in the news lately. Seven gay men have been beaten on Capital Hill since this June. Those that claim and preach that being gay is a sin are adding fuel to the fire and are as guilty as the people doing the beating.
I highly recommend the movie "For The Bible Tells Me So".
If we live the words, the world would be a better place. Now go and live your life and be kind to each other.
Let It Be So
Amen
Shalom
Until Next Time - Wise OUT
I get upset at right-wing Christians that quote the Old Testament while conveniently ignoring the lessons learned from the New Testament. The current argument they are expousing is that marriage is a holy union between one man and one woman. Well if one reads the Old Testament, marriage is actually a union between one man and several, even hundreds of women. Like I said I'm not a biblical scholar, so I guess I missed the part where the Red Seas parted and someone came forward and actually changed the definition of marriage.
They quote Leviticus as proof that homosexuality is a sin. People should try reading the entire book of Leviticus and discover that homosexuality is the same degree of a sin as eating shrimp. Think about that the next time you visit the Red Lobster.
There is a minister from Kansas that protests at the funerals of soldiers that have died in Iraq and Afghanastan. He and his followers claim the soldiers deserved to die because of the liberal policies of the US toward gay rights. I can't imagine what it would be like being a parent or a brother of one of these soldiers. Shame on anyone who does or thinks this.
Whether you are Christian, Jewish, Moslem, Buddhist, Hindu, Pagen or an atheist, we should all live by the words and wisdom of Jesus, Budda, Ghandi, and Martin Luther King Jr.
Gay bashing has been in the news lately. Seven gay men have been beaten on Capital Hill since this June. Those that claim and preach that being gay is a sin are adding fuel to the fire and are as guilty as the people doing the beating.
I highly recommend the movie "For The Bible Tells Me So".
If we live the words, the world would be a better place. Now go and live your life and be kind to each other.
Let It Be So
Amen
Shalom
Until Next Time - Wise OUT
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Walk The Talk
We all know people who say one thing, but then do and act another way. Most of the time it's just irratating and we can simply avoid them. Take note if I have avoided you lately. LOL.
However, when these people have some sort of hold or power over us then it's more than annoying, it is personal and important.
Just recently, Idaho Republican (is there another party in Idaho?), Larry Craig was arrested for soliciting an undercover cop in the Minneapolis airport. Earlier in his career there were rumors of him fooling around with male congressional pages.
Then last week, another Republican right here in our state (yes, we do have some Republicans), a state representative from Vancouver was "outed" after he reported to the Police that a male hustler was trying to blackmail him. Let's call this representative GOP.
Here's what we do know about the most recent event:
GOP was in Spokane attending a Republican state meeting. He went to an adult bookstore wearing red fishnet stockings. He met a young (very cute by the way) male, let's call him HOT. They went back to GOP's hotel. Everyone involved agrees with the story so far. Now there seems to be 3 different versions.
GOP's version: "We went back to the hotel and talked for a while, then I gave him $300 for gas." (Even in these days of Republican caused higher gas prices, I'm not sure what kind of car could take that much gas, but I digress).
"He asked for more money, but I didn't have any more. He took my wallet and id. He called me the next day and threatened to tell them that we had sex unless I paid him $1000. I called the police to report him." (For our story we'll simply call the police, POLICE.
HOT's version: "We went back to the hotel and had sex. He gave me $300. The next day, I'm arrested."
POLICE'S version: "We got a call from GOP saying he did have sex with HOT and paid him $300. HOT wanted more but GOP refused. HOT threatened to go public if he didn't get the money. Then GOP called the police."
Three versions of the same story. You choose. In this case (and it's not always so), but I think I believe the POLICE version.
These politicians don't realize the problem isn't that they are gay, or even that they are closeted. But the problem is that they consistently vote against gay rights. They both were powerful and have stopped legislation that is fair and long overdue. Both of these public Republicans have been very anti-gay in their voting and public statements. This just gives fodder to those unstable hate mongers. So these public people are dangerous. They will do anything to protect their secret. If you can't walk the talk, at least change the talk.
A couple blogs ago I stated that I had never met a gay Republican before, now I'm thinking that they are all gay, closeted but gay. GOP used to stand for Grand Old Party.
Until Next Time - Wise OUT
However, when these people have some sort of hold or power over us then it's more than annoying, it is personal and important.
Just recently, Idaho Republican (is there another party in Idaho?), Larry Craig was arrested for soliciting an undercover cop in the Minneapolis airport. Earlier in his career there were rumors of him fooling around with male congressional pages.
Then last week, another Republican right here in our state (yes, we do have some Republicans), a state representative from Vancouver was "outed" after he reported to the Police that a male hustler was trying to blackmail him. Let's call this representative GOP.
Here's what we do know about the most recent event:
GOP was in Spokane attending a Republican state meeting. He went to an adult bookstore wearing red fishnet stockings. He met a young (very cute by the way) male, let's call him HOT. They went back to GOP's hotel. Everyone involved agrees with the story so far. Now there seems to be 3 different versions.
GOP's version: "We went back to the hotel and talked for a while, then I gave him $300 for gas." (Even in these days of Republican caused higher gas prices, I'm not sure what kind of car could take that much gas, but I digress).
"He asked for more money, but I didn't have any more. He took my wallet and id. He called me the next day and threatened to tell them that we had sex unless I paid him $1000. I called the police to report him." (For our story we'll simply call the police, POLICE.
HOT's version: "We went back to the hotel and had sex. He gave me $300. The next day, I'm arrested."
POLICE'S version: "We got a call from GOP saying he did have sex with HOT and paid him $300. HOT wanted more but GOP refused. HOT threatened to go public if he didn't get the money. Then GOP called the police."
Three versions of the same story. You choose. In this case (and it's not always so), but I think I believe the POLICE version.
These politicians don't realize the problem isn't that they are gay, or even that they are closeted. But the problem is that they consistently vote against gay rights. They both were powerful and have stopped legislation that is fair and long overdue. Both of these public Republicans have been very anti-gay in their voting and public statements. This just gives fodder to those unstable hate mongers. So these public people are dangerous. They will do anything to protect their secret. If you can't walk the talk, at least change the talk.
A couple blogs ago I stated that I had never met a gay Republican before, now I'm thinking that they are all gay, closeted but gay. GOP used to stand for Grand Old Party.
Until Next Time - Wise OUT
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